What to expect when dating a Single Mother

And Advice, when doing so!

Imagine you really feeling this girl. She cute, she smart, and got it going on. Then BOOM, she tells you she’s a single mother. PAUSE.

Just because she is a mom does not mean, that’s a red flag. But when she tells you that, there are some things you must consider before moving forward to see if this is for you.

  1. You get to see first- hand how she treats her child. If you are looking forward to having a child or more with her, you will already get to see how she is as a mother and how she would treat your child(ren)
  2. Single-moms are all about their business. They have absolutely no times for games (unless it’s their son’s video games) Single-mothers can be very particular when it comes to allowing a guy in their space. If she’s giving the opportunity, don’t waste her time!
  3. They have a lot of patience. Single-moms have a weirdly insane amount of patience because they are doing everything on their own whilst dealing with emotionally unstable little beings
  4. Don’t Force it. Don’t force a relationship with her child(ren) let it come naturally.
  5. Just because she is a single mother does not mean she has “Baby Daddy” drama *insert eye roll*
  6. Ask her questions about her child(ren). Every parent loves to talk about their kids, showing interest in her family life will be plus in her book 
  7. Plan.Plan. As a single-parent, you cannot expect her to be able to just go out wherever and whenever. If you want to do an activity with her, plan so she can make the proper arrangements!
  8. The kids come first. That is just the way it is. More than likely she will always have her phone on her in case of an emergency. Don’t take it personally. Some days she may have to cancel because her kid got the flu. Be understanding and give emotional support.
  9. Single-mothers have a lot of love to offer to the right man. Why does Society view black single-moms as bitter and angry? That may be true for some, but that stereotype makes is hard in the dating world for those who aren’t like that.

 

 

****YOU HAVE TO ACCEPT THE FACT WHEN YOU ARE DATING A SINGLE-MOTHER YOU ARE “DATING” HER LITTLE FAMILY TOO ****

What I mean by this, is that if you are SERIOUS and want to be her in life… you must be in the kid’s life as well. When you guys are established, you will be the Male role model (if there are no other male figures around) and father-figure in the picture. Before you even thinking about dating her, you must ask yourself if you are ready to accept those challenges? Are you willing to love, and nurture another man’s child as if it were your own? Do you believe you are willing to be present in the kids and the mother’s life? Are you a family man? Ask yourself all these questions before you go interrupting her life and blocking her blessings. With that said I would like to leave this quote for the fellas…

 

“the biggest coward is a man who awakens a woman’s love with no intention of loving”

-Bob Marley

 

Single-mothers, do you have anything you want to add? Comment below with your input!

 

Peace, Love & Melanin

-The Brown Mom

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19 Comments

  1. Cleo Childress
    February 6, 2018 / 9:05 am

    I love this post. I am a single mother and can related.

  2. February 6, 2018 / 9:36 am

    Oh, my goodness… that Bob Marley quote at the end. Yes <3 <3 <3

    Thanks so much for sharing this. Single mothers deserve all the respect in the world, and I can totally understand why you wouldn't want to waste your time when you have little ones to look after. And yes to dating her family too! That's so very important to recognize that they are a package deal. Thanks for sharing this–fun to be in your space today and I love all of your gifs 🙂

  3. February 6, 2018 / 1:24 pm

    So very true! I loved this especially with the gifs!

  4. February 6, 2018 / 1:29 pm

    I actually enjoyed reading this. I’m not a single parent. However, growing up my mother was and I can honestly say this post is the truth on what to expect.

  5. Sheena
    February 6, 2018 / 6:57 pm

    Are you a single mother? If so, let me give you all the praise I can. I know it’s not an easy job. I really like your list, especially number 4, 5, and 8. Thank you for sharing.

  6. February 7, 2018 / 2:11 am

    Yeah, I agree with every single word. Love the gifs and Bob Marley’s quote.

  7. February 8, 2018 / 4:03 pm

    Great advice! Good luck momma 🙂

  8. Haley
    February 8, 2018 / 5:41 pm

    Interesting perspective girl! Love the humor to it

  9. February 8, 2018 / 7:30 pm

    Great information. This will be helpful for so many!

  10. February 12, 2018 / 10:05 am

    Good read!! Some men really don’t know what they’re getting themselves into

  11. February 12, 2018 / 10:05 am

    Very good advice!!

  12. February 12, 2018 / 11:11 am

    This is a great post! I’m a married mom and it’s hard. I have the utmost respect for single moms and all that they do. Wonderful advice!

  13. February 12, 2018 / 11:23 am

    Great list! Thanks for addressing this important topic!

  14. February 12, 2018 / 12:10 pm

    Not a single mom, so I can’t relate, but it’s wondeful you wrote this post. I hope you share this with a community of male bloggers as well. I think it’s very important to diffuse an article such as yours and share. Such an important topic.

  15. February 12, 2018 / 10:44 pm

    This is so great! I’m not a single mother, but I have so much respect for single moms!! Y’all really deserve a medal of excellence!

  16. February 13, 2018 / 1:15 am

    I was a single mother once and it was tough but so true patience and not time for games lol so true.

  17. Kim
    February 18, 2018 / 2:01 pm

    This is a great read. Awesome blog.

  18. February 21, 2018 / 1:14 pm

    I completely agree! Especially with the prepare and plan. When dating a single mother, you can’t just expect her to come out at the last minute. Lead time for dates is a must!

  19. February 23, 2018 / 1:27 pm

    Well said. I agree with every single last tip you gave. As a twice divorce mom of 2 boys ages 23 and 9 AND a special needs mom I made it clear while dating my life is NOT to be played with when there are kids involved. Point. Blank. Period. Anyone evening thinking to get involved with a mom must be ready to be flexible, understanding, and a positive male role model Great post!

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